Isn’t Love supposed be full of lifelong promises where we all promise our dedicated other halves ” that I will behold your hand no matter what. Then there is every relationship where we press red button only after saying ” I love u More” mostly twice. Relationships nowadays are a strange entity though. At the begginning its all like the bollywood movies.
It all begins when you like someone the moment you see them on the first day of your high school or college and as Sharukh khan taught us suddenly the sound violins is there all around us ya something of that kind. Those candid and very beautiful eye contacts happen. It all feels so good and finally one day u dare yourself to talk to them.That one conversation leads to exchange of numbers this conversation in no time turns to conversations. Conversations which see no days and no nights aint for sleeping now its all for chatting. Well this before relationship melodrama never exactly ends.
Well the epic Romance never stays though and then there is the BREAKUP. The dumper feels like he is free but the noob who just got dumped is now in a very excruciating spiral of pain anxiety and depression. Exactly the thing we should never do. But then breakup has its own importance in ones life because its a great teacher it teaches a lot of things and the biggest one of them is holding your own hand and listening to the sound of violins no matter who you are with or you arent with. The biggest thing we need to understand is nothing is going to last forever.
This is a infographic which tells us the 5 stages a dumper goes through after breakup.
Let’s begin with must do’s one should always follow after the breakup.
1 ACCEPT THE REALITY :
The first thing that is alway going to help is accepting the fact that you just had a breakup. That the “Love of your Life” left you. Whatever it is the reason is not the important factor what is important is that you have to accept the fact that an important person in your life is no more with you. Just accepting this could help you a great deal. You will start feeling lighter because accepting is the first step to leaving the hope of your ex returning back.
2. NOT CHECKING ON YOUR EX.
What’s in the past must be left in the past. Don’t unnecessary go hurting yourself by repeat telecasting all those good memories you had with them. This would only further increase you grief. Rather stay away from whatever makes you go into the memory spiral of them. Delete all those messages and photos which bring you memories. This would certainly start a process of erasing them from your mind.
3 FOCUS ON YOURSELF
This is important instead of wasting your energy crying over something just be brave enough to keep on working don’t let your heart be an obstacle. Do everything that you did before. The pain of heartbreak gives you a different kind of enthusiasm use it to improve yourself to be better.
Picking a hobby helps because hobbies are what we call the other loves of our life. Go to gym pump up your muscles or start painting if you like or maybe writing.The best thing is to pick something which will help you improve your skills or anything that would keep you busy.
4. START SOCIALIZING:
By this I mean go out with your friends, go to some vacation. By socializing I don’t mean start dating again this is the shittiest thing you will do because you will end up hurting yourself more. Rebound never help in recovering from breakups they will just end you in more of this shit.
Give some time to ease up things. Don’t date unless you feel you are totally fine with your last breakup and are ready for someone new in your lufe.
THE GOLDEN RULE: STOP HOPING YOUR EX WOULD RETURN.
Well this is the solution to every problem after breakup “HOPE”. All that pain all that grief is beacuse of the hope that our ex will return back to us. This single hope destroys you and keeps you lamenting. Once you stop hoping that they would return back to you and that life will be back to perfect. As the hoping stops you will slowly feel your life getting to normal day by day.
Doing this four things would certainly help a great deal. But what I have learnt from my past experiences is :
1. Love yourself and people will love you More:
Look at your own breakups and you will all feel this one thing Breakups actually hurt because we were too dependant on the other person. When this person leaves us there’s suddenly a void in our life which we fill by going in a sorrow.
Instead being dependant on somebody else’s love Love yourself beacause when you do this you will never ever feel the need to go over this shitty ” how to recover from a breakup blogs”.
So set this as a resolution that no is more important than I am and no one can love me more than I can. A famous novel “1984” written by “George Orwell” there’s a instance where the male protagonist is undergoing through torture and there’s a cage set on his head with rats in it and the male hero has a choice to give up his love or go through the torture and when the gates of the cage start opening the hero shrieks take Julia not me take her instead. So this small story is just to tell you that no one not even the love of your life is going to be there everytime. So start doing things for yourself.
2. NO ONE LIKES TO BE WITH CRIERS:
Stop victimizing yourself so that people will come and pity on you. Ya that’s the ultimate truth no one likes to be with loosers instead you can be strong and let it go. Letting go doesn’t mean you didn’t love enough but letting it go mean you love yourself more and that a breakup isn’t going to stop you from enjoying your life.
And it’s always like the saying :
“if you can’t change them , change them”
Guys beleive me crying over your ex isn’t the solution it only makes them push you away instead you can do a great thing never look back and show them that you can do fine without them. It burns them.